No matter if you are dating or you are married, there’s a chance you may be in an abusive relationship. Here are 5 serious signs to look out for, as well as information on what you can do if you find yourself in this type of relationship.
1. Controlling Behavior
If your partner is controlling you, they may tell you what you can do, what to wear, or even who you are allowed to hang out with. Additionally, an abuser might try to control all the aspects of your life, depending on the severity of the abuse. This can range from how much you are allowed to eat or to giving you a strict allowance.
2. Emotional Abuse
Something else that you should look out for is emotional abuse. If your mate is emotionally abusive, they might make comments about how stupid you are, how you couldn’t get another partner, or just say mean things to you in general. If you are being abused in this manner, you will probably hear a lot of insults aimed at you, and it could affect your self-esteem and self-worth.
3. Extreme Jealousy
A person that is abusive might also be extremely jealous. They may call you or text you all day when you are trying to work. Additionally, they likely want to know where you are and what you are doing every single minute. If they are unable to reach you, they may drive to where you are. With this jealousy, an abuser might also become aggressive if you talk to someone else or when you choose to spend time without them.
Along with jealousy, an abusive person may also be possessive of you. They might feel like you are their property and try to dictate that things be done the precise way they want you to do them. Moreover, they will sometimes do everything they can to make you see things in their point of view or force you to do behave a certain way.
For example, an abuser could try to get you to engage in activities that you don’t want to or make you uncomfortable, such as forcing you to have sex or convincing you that you don’t have anywhere else to go if you try to leave them.
5. Misplacing Blame
Another trait that you could see in an individual that is abusive is that they will not admit fault for their behavior. Oftentimes, there will be another reason given for why they acted a certain way. Perhaps they will say they had too much to drink or are facing a lot of issues at work. You may never hear them say that they have messed up or acted unfairly towards you.
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What You Can Do
If you note one or more of these traits in the person you are dating or married to, you should understand that there is help out there. You have resources, even if you were told that you didn’t by your abuser.
One is the Domestic Violence Support Hotline. They can be reached at 1-800-799-SAFE. This organization may be able to provide you with information you need as well as resources for planning to escape the abuse, if this is what you want to do.
Furthermore, you might want to reach out to a therapist. A professional should also be able to provide resources if you want to leave an abusive relationship. Moreover, they may be able to lend a hand in addressing any mental concerns you are experiencing and allow you a safe place to talk about the things you have endured.
If you have faced abuse for quite some time, there are likely ideas that you have been told that might not be true. A counselor can help you change how you are thinking and assist you in working on your self-esteem.
There are different ways that you may be able to spot an abusive person. If you note that the person you love is exhibiting any of the behaviors in this article, please remember that there is help available for you to take advantage of. You don’t have to take the abuse.
If you notice these signs in yourself, you should also consider reaching out for therapy when you want to make a change.